#mostly im wondering if this is just a me problem
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real question is why has tumblr started opening posts in a separate browser when i click 'view' on a post with blocked tags. i mean, it often does that with links to posts, but straight up taking you out of the app to view a post on your own dash? thats new
#some tags i have blocked are like#squicks where its fine if they come from some people bc i know its gonna just be a meme that vaguely touches on the subject#and from others i know its gonna be examining it in detail which i dont wanna see#so i click to view half the time#i also just like to have some warning before something sometimes#or the op tag spammed and its not actually about the thing i blacklisted#theres lots of reasons you might want to view a blocked post on ur dash#it happens fair often i dont think it should have to take u out of the app completely#shark talks#mostly im wondering if this is just a me problem
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This isn't completely related to selfshipping but i unironically love making up shipnames for my s/i and the tf2 characters.
[also to note: some of these are not canon; pyro and scout are friends; and saxton hale is just kinda there. idk he's alright.]
Engineer x Morale: Radio Repair
Soldier x Morale: Roger That
Spy x Morale: Esprit de corps, Radio Drama
Medic x Morale: Herzschlag / Heartbeat
Demoman x Morale: Boombox
Sniper x Morale: Radio Silence, National Outback
Heavy x Morale: Tea and Jam
Scout x Morale: Skip Distance
Pyro x Morale: Smoke Signals
Miss Pauling x Morale: Two-way Radio
Saxton Hale x Morale: Mating Calls [this one is just dumb ignore]
Proships DNI
#if you are wondering: yes i've completely exhausted any possible communication term that personally sounded cool#{insert me becoming autistic over radios because of my s/i having a radio motif}#half of these have a radio / communications motifs on morale's end bc see above#also some explanations on the name bc why not:#radio repair is self-explanatory (engie solving practical problems and all)#roger that is slang in the military (but mostly in general) to say ' i understand ' and ofc that would remind me of him#the english word morale was originated from the french term espirit de corps (so of course)#i had so much trouble w/ medic until i remembered 'heartbeat' a few days ago and i facepalmed by how long it took me to figure that out#by comparison; boombox was the fastest and by far the easiest to think of (radio motif + boom)#radio silence was also self-explanatory#but the 2nd one references yosemite national park and the outback (since morale originates in mariposa and sniper lives in the bush)#i kinda want to do more w/ morale originating in mariposa bc that place is gorgeous#fun fact: adding jam (strawberry blackberry ect.) is a common addition for russian tea culture and i wanted to use my knowledge somehow#both miss pauling and morale would communicate via two-way radio or walkie-talkie (so that was a easy pick)#smoke signals because get it fire + a form of communication im a genius#skip distance is a distance a radio wave travels in and it usually includes a hop in the ionosphere (<- NERD)#tf2 oc#oc x canon#and thats it#💞📻#[just me yapping]
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we had such a nice morning and then dewey guarded a sock from ryker
#dogblr#dog#my dogs#milo#dewey#ryker#ranger#it was still a nice morning i was just 🙂 ok son#that’s mostly what we’ve been working on with the behaviorist#cause dewey would go from 0-100 and just launch at one of the other dogs when guarding#no warning etc etc#im happy to report he now warns before launching like 75% of the time lol#i’ve always said dog-dog guarding doesn’t bother me#(milo does it) cause it’s such a natural behavior. but i at least want the dogs to warn one another and not just. bite#resource guarding is a very corgi problem according to the behaviorist#and i told her i don’t care to extinguish the behavior 🤷🏼 just teach dew he can talk to his brothers in other ways#it’s going well imo#some conditioning training + relaxation protocol are doing wonders (:#he’s going to grow into such a cool dog 😭😭😭😭😭
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for the love of god someone convince me from texting my ex, i daydreamed too closr to the sun and now i want attention😭
#its not a door i should open#but idk if im crazy and i need to drop my suspicions and try again or if im really going to be right some day#and we get involved again then that person comes along and its a messy awful breakup and i just cant do that to them#but fuck i wish i could be with them#i would love them but the problem is (aside from their drinking) it would be so easy to fall in love with them#but they want long term and aside from me knowing im leaving the province soon i dont think wish how i am now id be okay with pretending#its not fair#i want to see them again#im jealous of attention they probably get and that theyve probably given#and i really hate how i was made and that i cant just go with the flow#but again drinking and dark eyes aside theyre practically perfect#i miss them so much sometimes that im actually posting more on instagram in the hopes theyll notice me again#i wonder if they think about me or if theyre too busy getting laid#cause theyre in a band so duh obviously theyre getting laid#I FUCKING HATE MY INABILITY TO BE ATTRACTED TO PEOPLE#ITS NOT FAIR#I HATE MY SUPERSTITIONS SO DAMN MUCH I WANT TO LET THEM GO AND BE HAPPY BUT I CANT#I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THE PERSON I WANT TO BE WITH WITH PRETTY BLUE EYES AND BIG HANDS#fuck nate was so close to perfect and i love that theyre so interesting and fuck i think id just give in if they had blue eyes#i could ignore the other problems and feel better about trying to be with them#mostly i just want them to kiss me and hug me again#they were so gentle about it and it felt so safe and i wanna cry cause i know its not fair to contact them#but fuck i wish i could#i dont want to be alone anymore and they made me laugh#i dont know what to do but i wish it was easier to at least meet people if not date them#i just want to feel something for someone new so i can feel like im over them#but sadly they work at ikea and its not even the closest one to me but i have to go there for a new mattress topper and jars#and i keep imagining running into them AND ITS FUCKING ME UP i want to talk to them but i cant do that
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i havent even read enough gl to justify the feelings and emotions i have about kyle i just have the lovers heart and also something wrong with me. and my projection. in my mind he's just like me. and he would have loved college vending machine frozen cheeseburger and heating it up in the microwave at 1 in the morning because he was bored and didn't want to work on a drawing assignment on 20" x 30" paper that was due tomorrow in his freshman year. he would have loved going to the club to push off finals work that's creating the worst stress known to man in his brain. and he would love to annoy the fuck out of his roommate when high and avoiding homework on a saturday.
#IN MY MIND HE'S JUST LIKE ME and i understand why he dropped out of art school also.#i need to get back to my readings but im too into thinking about the couple dozen issues i have read#and then going i wonder what he was like in college. and the answer is definitely fucking annoying.#if i knew him i know we would be not arguing in art history class. i would be saying his takes are stupid outside of class during break.#and he would go i dont know how somoene can defend british utilitarian furniture so vehemently and try to liken it to bauhaus design#our arguments would also stem from having very different art history and therefore philosophy education. his background would be from a pro#who would focus on european canon as per usual while my prof was coming from the perspective of someone with a phd in asian art history#and a curriculum based mostly around exploring and investigating non euro art work and how movements like modernism and#post modernism functioned in other continents.#this is such a main blog post but idont care. EVERYONE HAS TO KNOW HOW I PROJECT AND INTERACT WITH HIM IN MY MIND#he would also hate how i argue for art even i dont care about by approaching it at the philosophical angle.#'how do you like this it's barely even art. or it is art. but it's a boring cop out for suckers. honestly.'#'the thing is i dont like it. i just think you need to expand your world views and stop being close minded. youre limiting yourself.'#you might go eiffel what are you basing this on? the answer is vaguely remembered panels in my mind plus generally taste opinions of his i#can gleam from what art references they give him within issues.#it would also be funny bc like. he has a background in design... he's just stubborn and snobby i think when it then comes to the realm of#fine arts. i think his opinions and how they operate in regards to design + illustration + non gallery art are probably quite different#but i cant lie. from the singular 'i dont wanna be some loser who shows up with a blank canvas to a gallery' panel i remember someone talki#about in a post i have used it to create a variety of thoughts i think he could have had.#and the answer is the opinions of someone definitely a little annoying in art school. with a pretty standard traditional training#and background that stems from euo+american art history and sensibilities that inform how he interacts with art. which is very normal#but i think it's funny to view him as someone i would probably roll my eyes at for some comments he would be making.#and it gets funnier with how he acts generally as a person.#kyle you cant be this snobby when you are drawing pin ups of your work crush in your home studio...#good lord this got so long i have a problem. hi. sorry to my new follower your kyle posting made me go ha ha kyle. i like that guy.#static.soundz#back issues box#< it might as well go there bc i blabbed way too hard and too much. sorry. overtaken by an entity in my mind
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anyway my wrist hurts its a sign i need to stop exteriorising the illness & start perhaps sleeping more please please please. doesnt feel like i deserve it considering how evil my brain is amking me feel rn but any reassurance im not a horrible person would be appreciated & barring that telling me honestly that i suck also would be 👍 ya hooooo
#why my left wrist. i do fuckall w that thing. is that the problem. perhaps? i mean i walked the dogs i suppose#there was a big fucking spider in the hallway glad it wasnt in the flat i wouldve cried. admittedly no lights are on#but yea im acting in ways i personally dont find appropriate but i need to exteriorise or ill no doubt do worse.#i just dont have very many outlets sadly. if i still did sports... if only...#mostly i sit & stew in my own thoughts concocting ways in which surely ppl are planning my downfall. not good!#downfall from what? um. the remaining mental stability i have. whcih isnt much so if anyone is plotting that pls cease thanks#just rough. wonder how much ppl call me a loser & a bad person behind my back. i am the problem headmate after all#wyrm or stablehand should front again theyre actually likable & stuff but anyway
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Do you like the state which you describe as being high?
Or does 'liking' have nothing to do with it. is slipping into that state simply an inevitable event that you embrace because it feels right? Have you made any further analytical observations on that state and what it means to you? I'm curious.
- cha0s
yeah :)
its like all the bad things dont really matter much anymore, i can just relax and worry later yknow? and everything becomes a lot funnier for no reason other than me being happy, like once i was in the park with my friends, and i laid back to watch the clouds. i just started laughing really hard for like 15 minutes bc the clouds were funny? and also they were moving, which was like, woahhhhh :0
and on top of that bc i dont feell at all worried, i can just be 100% myself, and also act on any dumb thought/idea that comes into my head. once i was in class, having barely slept, and i for some unknown reason lifted my pencilcase, let it fall back onto my desk, and burst out laughing. whilst my teacher is going on about some philosopher, i dont remember which one though. another time i started talking to the walls, also once on a sleepover i got very energetic and just ran in circles for a bit. all of these i very much would not do when awake, usually im pretty calm
all emotions are very very heightened, so as long as im having fun, im really having fun yknow? but as soon as i feel even slightly bad i might just curl up & cry forever, so its not always great. its takes alot longer to start feeling bad though. i dont really seek it out anymore like i used to, but it is fun sometimes, and sometimes i really need to relax about something & then it even helps, like even afterwards when fully rested i got rid of some stress & built up energy?
anywaysss an important note: sleep deprivation is really really bad for you, i stay up on purpose maybe once every 3-4 months, but i used to all the time, and that destroyed my memory, i can barely remember a good few years, and i keep forgetting important things now
#its also a lot easier to talk to people online#bc a big issue of mine is that i worry a lot that im a very bad texter#which causes me to be bad at texting#and i cant just kinda let go of that?#+ also having a bunch of people to reply to becomes a lot less scary and more fun#bc YAY!! i get to talk to people!!#i call it being high (on sleep deprivation)#bc all of that are pretty normal effects of doing drugs yknow?#i used to actually stay up late on purpose to make friends on discord#but i stopped doing that bc it was very bad for me#+ i used to hallucinate occasionally too during very stressful periods#but i know the risks now#& i think once every 3-4 months is probably fine?#i sleep mostly okay other than that#asks#vic#people#i assume you were referring to this?#i feel like i sound like i have problems#you may be wondering why im up so late now#but i can just sleep in#so its no problem :)
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#had my meeting w my addiction support worker#went pretty well: cried a lot#got into some of the root causes of why i drink in excess and mostly its just bc i hate living in my brain#and my life to some extent at the moment (my partner is wonderful and my friends are wonderful but other than that my life kinda sucks#its like my parents taught me that my feelings and problems are wrong or dont matter or arent real or#and its seeped into every aspect of my life i just have no regard for my own wellbeing#i literally sat there in front of the worker sobbing when i said that out bc i’ve never realised that before#but anyway. the appointment was fine my worker is lovely#and im doing a week challenge where i try not to drink at home At All#and he also told me to drink a glass of water when i wake up every morning and brush my teeth every day#oh and he said i should do one (1) nice thing for myself this week#personal
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I use canva daily for work and they have some ai bullshit which I don't touch but I decided to test it out today and see how dogshit it is. this is what it gave me for the prompt "beautiful clowns reading books which are about ducks"
#tbf i also did a very simple prompt ie “librarian reading a book” except the four pics it generated all gave me white men which like. hm.#not like librarianship doesnt have a whiteness problem but its mostly women so its just interesting that i got 4 different white men#like im not playing with it anymore but i wonder if it just defaults to white man unless youre super specific#tt
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anyone sometimes remember the final feast trailer and get pissed off bc of how they did fucking nothing with arlecchino
#like why even have such a villain reveal or at the very least attempt to make her a threatening presence#if shes not gonna even be an antagonist#leak warning here but this and the fact that shes gonna be released in like 4 patches makes me think they just gave up on her#or mostly im wondering wtf was their plan with her in the first place#im thinking back to dottores and scaras presentation and involvement in the 3.X archon quests (obviously excluding inversion of genesis)#and it just reinforces my thoughts abt how the things that happened in the fontaine aq were much grander#but the utilization of characters was just leagues above in the sumeru aq#(i guess clarification that arle not being an antagonist was not the only problem she just did nothing#just like words like 'you suck at protecting your nation >:(((' and then helping us completely off screen. the only actual#on screen contribution to the plot was suggesting that the archon isnt the real archon. now dont get me wrong i dont buy it#that shes just somewhat benevolent but lets just say i wouldnt bet my life on hoyo agreeing)
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oh so today is an *off day* off day-
#yeah the all nighters are being mean to me prooobably hdsfghdsj#anyways can anyone get my mean brain to shut up? prefferably with a comically large hammer?#shut up sheo#<- hm yes part of the problem as my talking tag#i know im loud and ridiculous and hate talking over people but dont always know when to stop BECAUSE I DONT TALK TO PEOPLE OFTEN-#and i cant tell when ive overstepped and so i start catastrophizing#but i dont wanna shut up completely like ive done other times; i really wanna keep making friends :((((#aughhh this isnt even comprehensible-#just; friends can you guys please please pleaseee promise me youll tell me if im being too much?#i wont get mad; i need to learn to work w other people instead of accidentally drawing attention to myself constantly#im so used to being alone and talking whenever i please here on tumblr to a mostly empty stadium#aughhh ignore me actually; period bad feels are prooobably creeping up on me already dsjkfhjdshhj#<- is absolutely not keeping track#hugs yalll!!!! i´ll be fine <3<3<3!!! brains malfunctioning today hsngdhdfgs#vent#<- i freakign guess????#we do be getting ventilation in here#google how to stop accidentally being disruptive???? i feel like im not getting called out just bc im not doing anything *bad*#but i cant help but wonder if im beign a bother#jdkdshfjgshhgfj ill get the silly back on in a few holdon-#(also man i really did hit my ocs w the berry bad coping mechanisms oh my goshhhhhh#sorry homemade blorbos ily <3<3<3
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#in the mental hospital currently#can explain might basically had a rly bad bpd moment at work//got fired//and then had to call myself to a hospital BUT I DID MANAGE TO#CLEARLY COMMUNICATE W MY SPOUSE ABT THE FACT THAT IM IN A HOSPITAL AND NOT LEAVING HIM WHICH SEEMS ALMOST LIKE A MIRACLE TO ME CAUSE WE WERE#we were about to break up but i think we actually love each other so it was a tough conversation#i have to do some serious thinking about#the psychosis i experience and some trauma as well cause its been really tough this summer honestly#first a bunch of shrooms while moving to a place i didnt know not being able to get all of my belongings organized resulting in obstruction#obstruction of vital routines#not to mention i freakin started focusing on like death type subjects cause its interesting to me and eventually i was like speaking in#keywords that didnt seem to make Any sense to my fiance even tho i was mostly just trying to help him have fun and have hobbies and stuff#outside of work#the keywords were in relation to a phenomenon i was researching regarding absent thought#i successfully filled the necessary absent thought slots in order to make sure i have graceful control over my thoughts#then i came back to reality! i guess i mostly get rly weird when thinking about the thoughts in my head cause i have a lot of things that#are private to me and i cant help the way my intrusive thoughts work#🥳🥳🥳PLUS I CANT MAKE THEM QUIETER IN INSTANCES WHEN I NEED TO LIKE TODAY WHEN I WAS AT WORK EXPERIENCING SOME SEVERE BPD SYMPTOMS AND THE#the instrusive thoughts literally made the whole employee team address the problem of me cutting myself as well as possibly scaring the#customers with any other intrusion i was having while i was listening to a song on the toilet to try and calm myself down#like if i had asked for a freakin break to handle the emotional situation i was almost suicidal and crying about i probably wouldve been#able to handle the situation but i was literally too tired and hurt and angry and depressed to even have the energy to control my emotions#enough to properly assess and judge#the situation enough to realize what was happening and how i needed to handle that#even then though i probably wouldve still gotten fired cause im not the fastest worker#there was also a bunch of psythought type stuff going on like my coworkers heard me loudly thinking about cutting myself in order to cope#it was only a couple of milliseconds but then it was like i had to go to the bathroom to listen to a song and that shouldntve even been like#shouldntve even been an issue but my anxiety was wilding too#basically went sicko mode the same day i started wondering about the other time i went sicko mode
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going to be a hater in the tags ;P
#sparrow speaks#aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#ive been reading a series of REALLY good fics recently -#like in character intersting stories well written ect ect#and its making me so upset becayse#sure these are good because im getting them from my beloved gf who has great taste#but like#theyll be fandoms where people write really in charcater fics and#fucking lif3 s3ries is not one of them#its probably cause im not reading r3nchanting stufff but oh my goddddd its miserable out here#short of smut fics its all ooc#AGH#its times like this that i wonder if maybe im the problem#maybe everyone else is writing them in character and IM the one horribly mischaracterizing them#who knows#bleh just complaining#alot of the d3s3rt duo stuff is fine#im mostly complaining about flower husbnds#sigh them
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i did a bit of replaying of fes today and let me tell you I AM THE HAPPIEST LIZZY to have walked the earth!!! I LOVE THIS GAME!!! even if i only played the first four days (im on april 18th and i did NOT go up to the 4th floor to talk to ikutsuki). random talking under the cut...
i genuinely think that the animated cutscenes in fes still hold up. im so charmed by the manga panel expression cut ins + the little 💦❓⁉ types of emotes that pop over the characters heads and the waist-up portraits. and i unironically love the models they're really cute. minato is too cute he's too perfect for my eyes i think he needs to be blown up immediately.
i think it's really neat to see the different social links and other party members very briefly in those "minato walks through (xyz) location" scenes. i was so excited 2 see them i was like!! visible exclamation point over my head bc i do treasure some of these SLs so much...
for shits and giggles on the full moon on the 9th, when you're supposed to be running up to the 5th floor. i decided to walk around the second floor and interact with things. i really enjoyed the additional dialogue bits from yukari there.
honestly a common trend that seems to happen a lot whenever i play p3 is just a spike in my love for yukari. like. i already love her a lot as is but whenever i see her dialogue again i just am filled with so much overwhelming love for how much she sticks to her values i just think it's so so nice how much she values honesty and transparency and i think i would like to try and articulate it better at some other point. she's so good.
and i think whenever i see the yukari moments from playing through p3 it always makes me so... (microwaves myself and blows up), i guess, disgruntled? that she got shafted SO hard in the movies like damn no wonder why i didn't really get into her brain space they barely gave us any time to peel her brain layers 😭 (though this is hardly exclusive to yukari).
ANYWAY my replay will probably be a very slow one, i really enjoy sitting through cutscenes and thinking about them and uh! persona has a lot of them. i think it'll be nice to do this in the evenings sometimes, though. i forgor how good the opening to the game was it's such a fun way to throw the player into the experience.
AND!!! it's definitely causing my brain chemicals to jump for joy and yipee over art ideas like OHHH IM SO!!! i love interacting with the source material again it's so nice to be reminded of the bits that resonated with you or things that you might've glossed over yet still are significant in the grand scheme of things. i've wanted to draw p3 again but when a lot of my ideas were just hanging around in my brain for a year or two sometimes i get attached 2 how it looks in my head and dont think ill b able to translate that so. its nice. 2 have new ideas on the chopping block.
GOD i love p3 and hmgnhh. i will always love to revisit fes i think. even though reload will be a thing. i think i am oddly entranced by how "dated" some of these mechanics are. like tiredness. or no part-time job. or the no party control. its such a fun way of informing minato's characterization that isn't really there when you try to make p3 closer to "modernsona" methinks BUT ANYWAY. thats all from me.
#lizz.txt#lizz.jpg#p3fes#ermm i hope no one frequents the fes tag i dont wanna be majorly perceived on this blog loool#especially this isn't really put together this is just me spitballing my love into the void haha#im mostly tagging it for archival purposes on my blog i like being able 2 see my classifications...#i love revisiting these games but also wow there r a lot of cutscenes gklhlghhfd#makes me wonder how much energy i'll have when playing reload lmaoo but THATS NOT MY PROBLEM RN!!#sighs. i love u minato. i love u p3. thank you for being such a great game to worm around in my brain#they mean everything to me....
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#vent? i guesssss?#just as i was about to vent about how im not sure if me and my gf are compatible in the long run#she writes me (and i didn't say anything to her) that she wants to change and work on herself and that she loves me#what do i do lol#anyways i just find it really hard to talk about myself with her#i can listen to her just fine. she always seems to have something to tell me about her day or her troubles#but when i share something i often don't get the feedback i need#and i wonder if it's a problem with my expectations or with her not understanding me#latest case. i told her that i want to learn another language#i asked what language should i try. she says german#i say that I'll probably never need it in my life and that finnish would be better bc it's my top pick of countries to maybe move to#she says something like 'ok then learn whatever language you want' (no the tone wasn't dismissive. it was fine)#and like. if i stayed quiet. that's it. that's conversation over#a month ago she told me to tell her more about my troubles since its her that mostly takes priority in our conversations. and like#for a person who told me something like this#to then be disinterested in what i have to say#ugh it's one of my squicks and it hurts me
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ME AGAIN!!! WITH A SAL X READER REQUEST (again) THIS TIME AIDJSJDH. a porn one at that !!!!
i need sal so bad its an actual problem
just like. imagine reader n the gang r havin a little sleepover. and reader is just so inconsolably turned on for some reason (maybe sal had his hand on their thigh when they watched a movie or smthin), so when everyone is asleep they asks sal to help them out :,,,) (his fingers r just so long n pretty,, they cant help but want them lol)
mayb he has to keep them quiet somehow, mayb covers their mouth/puts his fingers in their mouth to muffle them
hes so shy and nervous and awkward but he’s having the time of his life, watching the reader’s reactions. mayb he cant help but get himself off too, too enraptured by the way reader struggles to gasp and whine against his fingers
GOD DAMN.
would love if u wrote this mootie 🫶🏼🫶🏼 no pressure ofc ofc ofc !! (fem bodied reader pls if u dont mind <3!)
(i might write this too, i love my mind sometimes 🙏)
hey mootie!! Im giving you the fast pass because all the jjk stuff you repost got me into the series and I’m loving it, also cus you’re AMAZING! All characters are aged 20+ because this is based in chapter five of course, please do enjoy! :) (and for everyone waiting for their Hazbin requests to be filled - IT IS COMING! I am a busy woman.)
Needy - Sal Fisher X Fem!Reader
words : 2k, warnings : SPICAYYYY!!, creampie, fingering, slightly public, needy!sal AND needy!reader, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it guys, c’mon), hold the moan trope
The entire gang had been having more sleepovers ever since Sal and Todd had found the new house. Larry was moving in so it was just the normal next step, and you loved coming over so much. More specifically to spend time with your boyfriend, but also just to feel like old times again. Even Ash came from the city every once and a while, and this was one of those days.
Since it was Larry’s last day living in the Apartments, you had all agreed to made the most out of that small basement apartment you had spent so much of your awkward teen years in. You had been doing all the same shit you used to all day - smoking in the treehouse, playing card games for hours.
You and Sal huddled up around his old gamebuddy, playing the games Larry had kept long forgotten in the corners of his room, Larry and Ash painting on a shared canvas, chatting about life while Larry’s old metal mixtapes blasted in the background, and Todd and Neil cuddled up on the beanbag in the corner, occasionally joining in their conversation, but mostly just cuddled up and enjoying each others company. All of this was wonderful, nostalgic - even healing.
That was all up until Sal quietly suggested you all watched an old horror movie, and you were all huddled together in the dark, you with Sal leaning on your shoulder on your right, and Ash on your left, giggling and nudging you like old times. Larry laid out casually on the floor in front of you all because of how shit his eyes were from years of refusing glasses. Which should’ve been fine.
In fact - it was fine. Until Sal decided it would be a wonderful idea to put his hand on your thigh. Your bare thigh, just below where your miniskirt started. And even that - even that, you could’ve survived with some unwanted heat in your panties. But no, the blue fucker jumped at one of the scenes, hand sliding up the inside of your thigh to accidentally drag your skirt up, his hand knocking against your warm core - hand rubbing up against your clothed clit as he pulled his hand away, and all you could do was pull your hand away from where it was sweetly brushing through Ashley’s hair like you used to do, straight to your face to hide the unbelievably needy whine you would’ve let out.
“you okay?” Ashley whispers softly, looking over to you and you just nod quickly, watching her go back to watching the movie before shooting Sal a venomous glance, which he avoids nervously, already feeling your stare of death shoot through the side of his head. You pierced your lips together, putting one leg over the other and squeezing your thighs firmly shut, Sal’s hand now comfortably resting much, much lower on your thigh. Practically on your calve, as he preferred not to die tonight.
But that’s when it started, the unwanted slick already gently collecting in your panties, your mind running through all the things you wanted to do to him - what you wanted him to do to you. God, your mind was like a dog in heat. You couldn’t even bear to focus on the movie, sitting there, cautiously eyeing up your dead silent boyfriend. His shirt ridden up his stomach just oh-so-slightly from the way he was slouched back, soft happy trail of blue peeking out from under his shirt. God, what you would do to pull those stupid red torn up jeans down - not even fully - and ride him until he was shooting blanks and sobbing under you.
That is how it went on for the rest of the movie. That is exactly how it went on when you all decided the sleeping plan. That is where your mind still was when you and Sal decided to take the pullout couch, Todd and Neil in Lisa’s old room, and Larry sleeping on his bed with Ashley on a cot on his floor. With the thinnest fucking walls known to man kind. You should know - you grew up with the same ones.
Sal yawned as he laid next to you, mask placed softly on the table right beside the couch, as well as his glass eye floating in a cup, looking at you nervously as he pulled the covers up over himself too, gently wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you into him from behind, expecting you to be asleep by now - you were a heavy sleeper, he was an insomniac. It worked out like that. Until he heard a soft, half-whine of a whisper come from you.
“S-sal..” you mumbled softly, pressing yourself back against him, causing him to let out a soft whine of his own, hand around your waist flinching ever so softly. “P-please baby, need you so bad..” you mumbled out softly, turning around to face him, seeing the needy tears in your eyes had him melting as well, piercing his lips together as he grips softly at your side.
“N-no, you know how thin these walls are - I’m sorry about earlier, but..” he says nervously as he watches you whine and writhe softly, pressing yourself up against him, one hand on his chest. That’s when you decide to make the move, grabbing his hand and moving to in-between your legs so he can feel how absolutely soaked through your panties are, causing him to experimentally run his fingers over them, biting down on his scarred lip so hard he’s concerned it might bleed. You can’t help a choked whine and a buck of your hips against his hand at that, looking up at him with those needy eyes. Fuck.
He doesn’t say a word as he puts two shaky fingers to your lips, and you wrap your mouth around them without question, twirling your tongue around them and sucking on them like your life depended on it, all while he shakily pulled you panties to the side, prodding his fingers at your soaked hole, a quiet ‘fuck.’ Escaping his mouth when he slides one in with ease, feeling the vibrations around his fingers as you whine. “G-gotta be quiet, please - we h have to be quiet..” he mumbles out messily as he feels his cock throb to life in his sleep shorts, smearing precum across his thigh when he feels your cunt clench needily around his fingers.
He lets out a sigh of relief when you quickly nod at him, squeezing your eyes shut as he slowly starts to curl his long fingers inside of you, the obscene squealing noise making him whimper softly, hips accidentally bucking softly against your thigh as his cock tries to find some sort of friction - daydreaming about how easily he could slip inside you right now with how wet you are - how you would feel around his cock, velvety walks clenching around him and providing him that oh so delicious friction he was searching for.
His thumb moves to gently circle your clit as you start to find a slow grinding rhythm against his hand, practically riding his fingers as he finds that delicious spongy spot on your walls and pushes his fingers up against it, causing your cunt to give another urgent and needy clench, more slick falling into his palm, making a mess as he tries his best not to whine himself.
The slippery sounds of friction, the feeling of your thigh twitching pressed up right against his own throbbing problem, or the way his fingertips are pressing up against the entrance to your throat, the way his other fingertips are pressed up against your velvety walls. It’s driving him beyond insane, to the point he’s thinking he might cum in his sleep shorts if it continues this way. And he didn’t bring an extra pair - and it would just be a waste if he didn’t cum inside of you - not while you were practically begging for it.
“B-baby.” He whines out, catching your attention for a second, tears of pleasure falling softly down your face as your hips still, whining against his hand from the way you stopped while being so close - it was beyond downright embarrassing how quickly you were about to cum, and you were honestly glad he stopped you. “C-can i please put it in? J-just the tip, please baby, ‘s so sensitive. Need you so bad.” He whines quietly and softly, pressing his hard on against your thigh to back up his own statement, whining softly again. “Just wann’ cum inside you, please…” he whispers, watching you nod eagerly.
Pulling his fingers out of you with an obscenely wet pop, pulling your soaked panties to the side and he lets out an erotic sigh pressing his face into the crook of your neck as he pulled his shorts down, cock slapping to attention against his abdomen, precum beading from the sensitive tip as he shakily pulled your hips up, grabbing the base of his cock and gently rubbing it against your entrance, and you could hear how wet you were when he moved his tip to part your drenched lips and drag through them, whining into the crook of your neck as you grabbed his shoulders, brain fuzzy with the way his hot tip felt rubbing against your clit, sticky with your own slick.
He bit down hard on your shoulder as his tip popped past the tight ring of muscles of your entrance, desperately rutting against you, trying not to whine or let slip how good it felt to be inside you - the way your hot, heady slick insides felt like they were trying to pull him in deeper. His hand cupped your mouth quickly, stopping you from making a sound as he gently pushed himself further inside you, feeling you grip tightly at his shoulders, nails digging into his flesh as he broke his promise, pushing his cock inside of you, inch by desperate inch, trying not to slam his entire cock into you at once - which was unbelievably hard, considering how wet you were, and how desperate he was - his tip prodded at your cervix, making you jerk forward, groaning against the palm of his hand.
He rutted into you desperately, not daring to thrust properly, letting everyone else hear how wet and desperate you were, or even worse, how even needier he was for you, the head of his cock bumping against your sweet spot, the only sound in the air being the quiet sounds of your muffled whines, and the quiet rustling of sheets as he ground into you, abdomen rubbing against your clit as he did so, bringing you to the edge so much faster than you ever expected, cunt clenching around him, the sign that you were about to cum. He just nodded into the nape of your neck, hips refusing to stop.
“m-me too, fuck, me too, me too ‘m gonna cum, ‘s too tight, ‘s so warm.” He half whines, half whispers right into your neck as he detaches his teeth from your shoulder for a second, before hurriedly latching them back onto your neck as you feel his cock violently twitch inside you, whining desperately into his hand as you felt yourself start to cum, cunt clenching around him desperately, slick flooding from you and creating an obscene squelching between you two as you spasmed and arched under him.
He groaned into your neck as he quickly pulled his face from your neck, smashing his lips desperately against yours, muffling his own groans as he pushes himself as deep into you as he can go, cumming hot ropes into you as he stills, thighs twitching as he pulls his mouth from you, both of you panting and catching your breaths, feeling the warm liquid pool out of you and spill onto Sal’s abdomen as he lets out a small and raspy chuckle, still catching his breath.
“You’re going to be the fucking death of me.”
#sal fisher#sally face#sally face x reader#larry johnson#sal fisher x reader#sally fisher#ashley campbell#todd morrison#neil sally face#sal fisher smut#sal fisher x reader smut#JESUS CHRIST!!! WOW!! MY FIRST SMUT!!
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